Sunday, June 18, 2006

10 Lies Pornographers Tell


1. Porn stars are breaking into the mainstream. You’re not cast as the stripper who dances naked at the bachelor party and then has a coat hook put through the back of her head while she’s fucking the star because you have potential as a character actress. You’ll get offered ‘Third junkie hooker’ because junkie hookers one and two get to keep their clothes on and there’s a line of real actresses out the door fighting to do those parts, and getting a five episode story arc on CSI doesn’t count when they’re using your noteriety for free publicity. The mainstream’s happy to inject a little pornster sex-appeal when they need it, and know most are so desperate for mainstream recognition they’ll take $250 for a twelve hour day as long as they don’t have to screw anyone.

2. Teens. Women are only teenage and legal for two years. Tiffany Teen’s been online since 2003 and if you think that she was eighteen when she started… wanna buy a bridge? You can’t really fault women who exploit the borderline-pedophile market but seriously, when was the last time you saw a real teenager in a pink mini-skirt and pigtails?

3. Sluts. Despite what it says on the box, if you call a woman – even a porn performer - a nasty cum-drinking bitch when your not having sex with her, she’s probably going to knee you in the nuts. The tubby mommies-boys and misogynists who market porn want you to think the way they view women is how women in porn see themselves. Try calling a performer a ‘dirty cock-socket’ at a trade-show if you think it is, in fact, true. Watch your head.

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